I woke up this morning at around six am. The night before, I had gone to bed with a request on my heart. The prayer was ” If I believe in faith and I really do, than I believe I can be healed right now. But I have so many thoughts about my healing. Please, bring me someone who healed in the way I am healing. So, I can understand if it is possible to continue to live in Joy and truth for a long time. ”
When I awoke a thought was in my head. It was, if I wanted to continue to be joyful, I had to choose to do my prayer every morning no matter what the circumstances. This prayer is;
“God, thank you for another day on this earth. So that I can live my truth. Please let me be a light for you .”
I fell back asleep. When I woke up. I was in a lot of pain, nauseas and having a bad reaction to the new pain regime. I felt like I was very sick. I asked my husband and daughter for help, because I new I was not being in a Joy place. After breakfast, we had a plan to go to the greenhouse because we planned on selling some of the stuff that we loved doing. I did not feel like going, but my head said Blue Grass nurseries.
When we got there I was having a hard time walking. My daughter kept me going. The next thing I knew I was standing by this woman and my husband. He said she was a survivor and she saw me. She felt like she had to speak to me. I was pleasantly surprised.
She said she had been cancer free for 18years. When she went in to the ER it was a stage four cancer in her lymph system. She had a large growth in her throat and basically she had to go through all the medical treatments, including radiation and Chemo. She said the first year was harder, but it all changed for her when she let it go and “laid it all at the foot of the cross”. This is the same way I have been saying give it to God or the Universe. It just means, evertime I have a decision to make, especially if it is one I don’t like to make. I ask for help from God. If I have a clear thought in my head to do something, even if it seems scary, I do it. This is not easy to do. Especially, when you feel crappy. However, it always ends up being joyful.
This lady affirmed all of what I have been saying and thinking. She says she was drawn to the greenhouse because she loves growing stuff. She said she is drawn to certain people and she still goes to each of them and gives them time. She said she had to give up her very successful job and live off of faith and trust. She was able to get everything she needed and more. She also said that everyday she feels warm in the embrace of her God. I asked what she did each morning? She said she learned that she had to be thankful almost constantly. It never changes, it just gets easier to do as time goes on.
I was so grateful for her to listen to her heart and come to me. I am really grateful for her story. It didn’t just give me hope but it put my mind at ease. This is a journey we cannot do alone. It takes people, faith, gratitude and love. It also takes failure, pain and a will to change with the flow. No matter how you say it, it remains the same. Every minute you have a choice. If you choose faith it feels better. When you choose fear or our habit of fear, we get more fear. I guess what I am saying is like the lady said. “I choose to lay it down at the cross”. What ever that may look like. I am so grateful when people do what comes to their hearts. May you always listen to the voice that guides you to the right thing. God Bless ❤️